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Title/Chapter: Song to Sing (03/??)
Author: amanda: jaclyn’s twin sister
Pairing: Zac / OFC: Olivia
Genre: Love / Romance / AU
Rating: R
P.O.V.: first person, switches back and forth but is clearly marked.
Notes: This is written for the Hanfic Genre Challenge
Other Notes: Sequel to Collide
Word Count: 1,753
Warning: Strong Language
Previous Chapters
Summary: After The Walk Tour ‘08, Olivia and the rest of Late Night Romance move down to Tulsa so Olivia can be with Zac. After entering her second trimester, there’s a tragic loss that sends Olivia in to a devastating depression that puts a huge strain on her relationship with Zac. Will they be able to overcome this hardship or will it destroy them?

 

CHAPTER THREE

ZAC’S POV

I drive for I don’t know how long before I end up at my older brother’s house. I sit in his driveway for a while before I notice his wife standing at the bay window, peeking out at me. Then the front door opens and out walks Taylor. He makes his way down the gravel drive towards my car. He taps on the glass of the window and I roll it down. “Why don’t you come inside?” he suggests. I nod numbly, putting the window back up, turning off the car and climbing out. Taylor puts an arm around my shoulders and guides me in to his warm, inviting house.

Taylor sits me down on the couch in his living room and his wife Natalie brings me a cup of tea. “Drink this,” she says. “You look like you could use something warm.” I take a sip of the tea and close my eyes as the warmth seeps in to my veins. I hadn’t realized how cold I was until now. Apparently I forgot to turn the heat on when I was driving and I have no coat, just a t-shirt on. “I’ll give you two some privacy,” Natalie says. “I think this is between brothers.” Then she pecks her husband on the lips, making my eyes water, and leaves the room.

Taylor sits across from me on the coffee table, letting me just sit for a moment, sipping at the steaming mug of tea. “Whenever you’re ready,” he says quietly. I just nod. We sit in silence till my mug is half empty. Then I set it down on the coffee table and pull my knees up to my chest, hugging them tightly.

“So what’s going on?” Taylor asks. “Why are you here so late?” I shake my head, tears falling down my face. “Oh, Zac,” my brother murmurs, getting up to sit next to me on the couch. He wraps an arm around my shoulders and hugs me to his side. “What’s wrong?” he asks softly. I lean my head on his shoulder and sigh. As I start telling him the story of the fight with Olivia, a flood of tears creep down my face and I’m unable to stop them, nor do I want to.

“I just can’t believe I said that to her,” I whimper. “I actually told her to get the fuck over it. Who does that? I mean…” I shake my head. “I am the lowest of all scum of the universe.”

“Hey now,” Taylor scolds gently. “Don’t talk about yourself that way. It’s been hard for her, really hard, but it’s been hard on you too. Does she realize that?” I shrug. “Maybe that’s something you should tell her.”

“Maybe,” I whisper. “But she doesn’t even want to marry me anymore. She broke off the engagement!” A strangled sob leaves my lips. I’ve never been so upset before. Not even when my grandmother died and we were the best of friends. This is worse, ten times worse. At least my grandmother is still around, in spirit. If I lose Olivia now, she’ll never be around again.

Taylor hugs me tightly and kisses my hair. “Zac, I don’t think she meant it,” he says.

I pull back to look at him, incredulous. “She didn’t mean it?! You didn’t see her, Tay! She definitely meant it!”

“Zac,” my brother says, brushing my hair back from my face. “I am entirely sure that she didn’t mean. I think she’s still too upset over losing the baby to even think about getting married. She’s probably scared of getting pregnant again too. You can understand that, right?”

I nod and sniff. “Yes, but I just…” I shake my head. “What if that’s not all it? What if she really doesn’t want to be with me anymore? I don’t think I could handle that. Especially not after losing our baby. I mean, I know it was six and a half months ago but… Jeez. It’s still painful, you know?”

Taylor nods. “I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you two have suffered because of this. Ever since it happened, I’ll look at the kids sometimes and just get heart-sick for you. I can’t imagine not having any of them here.”

“I get jealous seeing you and Natalie with the kids,” I tell him honestly, quietly. “I want that to be me and Olivia. I want us to have a family. I want us to have a dozen little kids running around our house. But now I’m scared that’ll never happen.” I snuggle deeper in to my brother’s embrace. He’s always been a source of comfort my entire life. One of my earliest memories is of him comforting me during a thunder storm. I was scared out of my mind, but he told me he’d protect me because that’s what big brothers do. Now he’s doing it again.

“I think what you need to do is go back home,” Taylor tells me. “I think you need to talk things out with Liv, tell her how you’ve been feeling this whole time. Maybe she doesn’t know how bad it’s been for you too. I mean, do you even talk to her about it? Or do you put on a brave face for her?”

I sigh. “What do you think?” I ask. “I mean, I’ve gotta be strong for her. I’ve gotta be strong so she can get better.”

“You don’t have to be strong all the time,” Taylor murmurs. Then we sit quietly for a while until I decide it’s time to go back home, talk things out with my… what? What is she to me now? There’s no formal title to what we are, but she’s still the love of my life.

When I get home, all the lights are on in the house, which isn’t surprising. Olivia doesn’t like to be in the dark when she’s home alone. But does she really need every light on? I move through the house turning off some of the more unnecessary lights on my way to the second floor. I walk down the hall to the master bedroom and when I get there what I see stops me in my tracks. There in my bed is Olivia and her best friend Aaron and they are both naked.

Rage boils in my veins and, with a growl, I grab Aaron by the back of the neck and rip him from the bed completely intent on pounding the shit out of him. I pull my fist back, ready to strike when I hear a gasp from the bed. I look up to see Olivia, her face full of fear. I drop my fist and push the terrified bassist back towards the bed. I run around the room throwing things in to a duffle bag as the other pair of adults scramble to get dressed. “Zac! It’s not what you think!” Olivia exclaims.

I whirl around to face her. “Did you have sex with him?” I growl. Her mouth opens and closes a few times before she whimpers out a yes. “Then it’s exactly what I think!” I snap, then I go back to tossing things in to my bag. When I’m finished I stomp down the stairs, Olivia trailing behind me, calling out to me. But the blood pounding in my ears helps to drown out her voice. I jump in to my car and peel out of the driveway for the second time that night, that year. I once again make my way to Taylor’s house.

 

OLIVIA’S POV

Once Zac leaves the house, I go running back upstairs to the bedroom to grab my cell phone. I dial his number over and over again, but he just won’t pick up. I flop down on my ass on the floor, crying in to my hands. I feel Aaron wrap his arms around me, holding me close. “Shh,” he murmurs. “Shh.” He rocks me back and forth trying to calm me down, but all I can think about is how I’ve now ruined everything. If there had been a chance before, there definitely isn’t one now.

“Shh, Liv,” Aaron murmurs. “Everything’s going to be okay.”

I jerk out of his embrace and glare at him. “Okay?! Okay?!” I exclaim. “How the fuck do you think it will ever be okay now?!”

“He loves you. He’ll forgive you. Maybe not me, but you, yeah,” Aaron says.

“You’re fucking insane!” I yell. “He will never forgive me for this! Never! And it’s all your fault!” I punctuate my words with my fist hitting my best friend in the chest.

“Hey now!” Aaron exclaims. “If I remember correctly you asked me to have sex with you!”

“You could’ve said no!” I shout, tugging at my hair. “Why didn’t you fucking say no?!”

“Because I’m in love with you, you idiot!” Aaron yells. “God! I can’t believe you haven’t figured it out after all these years!”

“What?” I ask quietly.

Aaron sighs and scrubs his face with his hands. “I’ve been in love with you for so long, Livvie,” he tells me. “And I was so happy when you found Zac, I really was. But I can’t say that tonight didn’t get my hopes up just a little.”

“Aaron…” I whisper, at a loss.

“It’s okay,” he says. “Just forget I ever said anything. We can pretend like this never happened and I never told you how I feel.” He jumps up and starts heading for the door.

“Aaron, wait!” I call after him.

“No, just forget it,” he calls back. When he gets to my front door he stops with his hand on the doorknob and turns to look at me. “Have a nice life,” he says. Then he leaves, slamming the door shut behind him.

I begin to sob. I’ve lost everything tonight. I’ve lost the man of my dreams and my best friend. The two people that mean the world to me. I don’t know how I’m going to survive this. I wander around the house in a daze, flicking the lights on in one room and then off in another. When I finally make my way back upstairs, all the lights on the first floor are out. I’m not even sure if the door’s locked or the security system is on. But I don’t care. I just climb in to bed, curling in to the fetal position and cry myself to sleep. Way to start the new year off.



 


Date: June 9th, 2010 04:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] prettyzombiegrl.livejournal.com
This is so sad!! I feel awful for Liv but at the same time she did basically bring it upon herself. Man, this is getting better by the chapter!

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