writefiction | Glamberts Big Bang Chapter 07 (Reply)

Title/Chapter: Kiss Away the Pain (07/16+Epilogue)

Author: amanda: jaclyn’s twin sister
Beta:

mindchnger
Artists:

gargoyles42 /
Fandom: American Idol
Pairing: Adam Lambert / OFC [Luxe]
Rating: PG-13
P.O.V.: First Person, Adam Lambert (it switched!)
Warning: strong language, discussions of rape and abuse (non-graphic)
Word Count: 1,666
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Summary: Luxe and Adam have been best friends since Hollywood Week, but now that tour rehearsals have begun, Adam is finding out things he'd never know about his friend. Things that no one should have to go through. Can Adam be her Knight in Shining Armor? Or will he be the support Luxe needs to overcome her fears and help herself?

ADAM’S POV

It’s late at night, or early in the morning depending on your point of view, when we stop at a little diner in… Well, to be honest, I don’t know where we are at this point. All I know is that my stomach is saying, Feed me, Seymour!

We manage to fit all of the Top Ten in a large corner booth in the front of the restaurant, the handlers in booths on either side of ours. Luxe is situated between Kris and myself. We order our drinks and peruse the menu. When the waitress comes back we all order. As we wait for our food, chatting about what a great show we had, I suddenly notice that Luxe is sitting stiff as a board next to me. I look at her and her expression is that of terror. I follow her gaze to a tallish man in his twenties standing by the entrance. He’s got dark red hair dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He seems to be searching for someone.

Next to me Luxe’s breathing starts sounding kind of funny. I look at her and she’s white as a ghost, still terrified but now with a hint of panic on her face. She clutches at my hand tightly, her palms covered in a cold sweat. “Luxe?” I murmur. No response. She just continues staring at the man by the door. That’s when it hits me. The guy must be Jackson.

He followed us, that son of a bitch!

I turn around and whisper to the nearest handler that Jackson has somehow found us and is over by the door. His gaze moves to where I nod towards and he gives me a short nod telling me to stay put. The handlers at his booth get up, a few going over to Jackson and others going off to… I’m not sure what, but my guess is to talk to management. Right now that doesn’t matter all that much to me. Right now I’m just concerned about Luxe. If she keeps breathing the way she is, she’s going to hyperventilate. I turn to her, murmuring to take deep calming breaths but it’s like she can’t hear me. She’s still completely focused on Jackson and the handlers.

I look over at Kris for help. He’s observing Luxe. “Kris!” I hiss quietly. He looks at me and nods. Then he dips his napkin in his ice water and places it on the back of our friend’s neck.

“Come on, Luxe,” he murmurs. “Deep breaths. Deep, slow breaths.” For a quick second Luxe’s green eyes dart to Kris’ face but end right back up on Jackson. “Breathe with me,” Kris tells her. He takes one of her hands from mine and places it against his chest. “Feel my chest rise and fall and match it with your own. Come on, Luxe. In, 2, 3, 4. Out, 2, 3, 4.” As he counts and holds Luxe’s hand against his chest, I notice she starts breathing in time with his counting. “Good, Luxe, very good,” Kris murmurs encouragingly. “Keep going. Gotta slow you down. Gotta work through this attack.”

Kris keeps on counting, but gives me a look. I nod and begin to rub soothing circles in to Luxe’s back. “It’ll be okay,” I whisper. “Everything is okay. He can’t get near you. He won’t come any closer. The handlers won’t let him. Just keep breathing, baby.” After a while of my soothing words and her focusing on her breathing, Luxe calms down. I pull her close, but her eyes stay pinned to Jackson who looks to be arguing with the handlers and restaurant management. I watch him too. I want to know where he is at all times. I don’t want him coming anywhere near my girl. She’s so frightened, huddled against my side, gaze never wavering.

Finally, after what feels like forever, the deputy sheriff of this small town shows up. He takes Jackson by the elbow and escorts him outside. I just hope he runs him out of town too. Not a moment later, the waitress comes with our food. Luxe continues to stay curled in to my side, but her grip has loosened just the tiniest bit. When the waitress sets her plate down in front of her, Luxe looks at it, then buries her face in my shirt. “What’s wrong, pretty girl?” I murmur quietly.

“Too sick to eat,” she tells me.

“Does your stomach hurt?” I ask. Luxe nods. I stroke her hair and kiss the top of her head. “Okay, you don’t have to eat, but at least sip at your Coke. It might make your tummy feel better.” Luxe nods again and reaches for her glass, taking a small sip through her straw. After setting the drink back down, she instantly curls back in to me. She sits there, staring down at her lap, as the rest of us eat.

When we’ve finished eating and the waitress comes back over to clear our table, I ask her to box up Luxe’s dinner. The poor girl hadn’t eaten one bite of her sandwich or french-fries. Soon after we pay and head back out on to the buses. Luxe still can’t let go of me, so she climbs on to the boys’ bus with us and so does Allison. She and Kris follow us to the back lounge of the bus. We settle down, Kris and Allison on one couch and Luxe and I on the other. “So…” Kris begins slowly, wiping his hands on his jeans. “What’s going on? Who was that guy at the diner? Was he the reason you were having a panic attack?”

Luxe nods and curls in to a ball, her arms circled tightly around my waist. I stroke her hair soothingly, letting our bodies meld in to one. The petite 24 year old opens and closes her mouth a few times, trying to speak, but nothing comes out. She takes a few deep breaths and then says shakily, “That was Jackson. He’s my ex. He um, he was, he was very abusive to me; physically, emotionally… sexually.” She shakes her head, the tears rolling down her face. I reach out to wipe at the salt water on her cheeks, brushing at them gently.

Allison gets up then and comes over to sit next to Luxe. She wraps her arms around her best friend, resting her cheek against her head. “I’m so sorry,” she whispers, kissing Luxe on the cheek. Then it’s Kris’ turn to get up. He comes over and sits at her feet, reaching up to hold on to one of her hands.

“How’d you get away from him?” he asks.

“I um… I made us late for a movie and when we got there it was sold out,” Luxe tells him. “He got really angry and blamed me then he hit me in the face, which is a place he’d never hit me before. He usually marked me up where it could be covered.” She pauses to sniffle and clear her throat. “People saw what he was doing and three big guys jumped him and threw him on the ground. The police were called and… I told them everything; the years of rape and abuse.”

Luxe sighs and I give her a little squeeze of reassurance. “You’re doing good,” I tell her quietly. She nods a little and continues her story.

“So the judge gave him eighteen months suspended jail sentence,” she says.

“What does that mean?” Alli asks.

“It means as long as he didn’t get in trouble for those eighteen months, he wouldn’t have to do any jail time,” Luxe explains. “And he actually kept out of trouble that whole time. I was able to get a restraining order and I renew it every year. When I went on Idol I had to explain to all the producers and anyone else that needed to be informed about the restraining order. Jackson wasn’t allowed near the mansion or at any of the tapings. Now he’s not supposed to be at any of our shows. I’m not sure how he got in to the venue, how he even got tickets because they were supposed to red-flag his name so he couldn’t buy tickets. Buying the ticket shows intent to break the restraining order.” She shrugs.

“We’ll protect you, Luxey,” Allison murmurs. “Don’t you worry. We won’t let anything happen to you.” Kris nods in agreement and I give her a squeeze.

“You guys have to promise me you won’t tell the other Idols,” Luxe says, worry etched across her beautiful face.

“Why not?” Kris asks. “I’m sure they’d feel the same as us. They’d make sure you were safe. Especially Lil. You know how protective she can be.”

“I just… I just don’t want them to know,” she answers. “I don’t want anyone to know about my horrible past, okay?” Kris nods. “Please, just promise me you won’t tell. Just promise me. Please.”

Kris and Allison nod. “Of course,” Kris says. “We won’t tell if you don’t want us to. I promise.”

“Yeah, I promise too,” Alli replies. “My lips are sealed.”

I snort. “That’s a first.” The red-headed teenager reaches around Luxe to slap me upside the head. “Hey!” I exclaim laughing. Then I feel Luxe sigh and relax against me. She’s been so tense since seeing Jackson. It’s good to know that she’s starting to feel a bit better.

We turn the TV on, settling around the small room, Kris on the floor, Allison on the couch across from Luxe and me. Luxe continues to cling to me and I have no reason to complain. I love being this close to her. I just wish it was more about want than fear. But really, I’ll take whatever closeness I can get no matter the reason. Once the other three in the room have fallen asleep, I finally let myself succumb to the pull of slumber.