writefiction | Accepting Trust

Title: Accepting Trust
Chapter: 4 - the letter
Author:

punksoul
Pairing: slight Seb/David
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimor: Completely fiction. I do not know or own anyone.
Summary: Benji's the punk the new kid at school learns to trust. There's an instant connection, an instant attraction. [lame summary]
Previous Chapters: One, Two, Three

Comments are always appreciated :)

CHAPTER FOUR: the letter

My first week of school wasn't so bad thanks to the twins, Billy, Paul and Aaron. They're all pretty cool guys. I've gotten closest to Benji. I think part of the reason is because he knows about my secret with David. I still haven't explained it to Benji. But he also doesn't try to force it out of me. He's the only one I can talk to about David. And he's really understanding. If I cry, he just holds me and tells me it'll get better. I don't know how well I'd be doing without him. Plus, my parents are happy that I've made some friends and I can 'forget about that Desrosiers boy.' Whatever.

Now it's Saturday and I'm knocking on the door of the Madden house. I hear feet running down the stairs inside. Then the door opens and there's Joel. He grins.

"Hey, Seb. Benji's upstairs," he tells me, letting me in.

"Thanks," I reply and head up the stairs.

Benji's sprawled on his bed reading a magazine.

"Hey," I greet him from the doorway. Benji looks at me and a grin spreads across his face. Then he sits up, reaching over to his nightstand. He holds up an envelope.

"What's that?" I ask, curious. Benji sniffs the envelope.

"Smells like a love letter to me," he says. I race over to him, jumping on the bed and grabbing the letter. I rip it open and begin to read.

Dear Sebby,
Hi, Baby. It was so good to hear your voice the other day. I've missed you so much. I still miss you. I can't stop thinking about you. This is so hard, being away from you. Do you miss me?
Sorry I don't have a lot of time to write. I'm in study hall. I should be working on my English paper. But obviously I'm not. Ever since you left it feels like my heart's been sliced and diced. I can't live without you.
The bell's going to ring any minute. I have to go. Write me back soon. Remember that I love you. So much.
You are the song I know.
Love, David

I fold the letter back up and put it in the envelope, fighting back my tears.

"What'd he say?" Benji asks gently.

"Oh, you know. He misses me, can't live without me. He loves me and this is hard for him," I answer, the tears sliding down my cheeks. Benji takes my hand, rubbing it softly with his thumb. "The part that gets to me most is the way he signed it."

"And how was that?" Benji asks.

"You are the song I know. Love David," I answer.

"What does it mean?"

"It's a line from our song."

"You guys have a song?" Benji says in this 'Aww-that's-so-cute' voice. I nod and sniffle.

"Yeah. He played it for me and at the end he kissed me. It was our first kiss," I explain.

"That's so sweet," Benji responds.

"David was always doing romantic things like that," I tell him. I wipe my eyes and look at my friend. Tears start raining down my face again.

Benji frowns and wraps me up in his strong arms, pulling me to his chest. I cling to him, burying my eyes in his shoulder.

"Shh. It's okay," he soothes. "You're gonna be alright." Benji holds me tightly, rubbing my back. I lean into his chest.

"You're okay," Benji says gently. "I've got you. You're okay."

After a while the tears stop, but I still hold on to Benji. I take a deep breath.

"You okay now," Benji asks. I nod. He tries to pull away, but I won't let him.

"Hold me," I whisper softly. His arms go back around me tightly. "Benj?"

"Yeah, Seb?" he responds.

"I wanna tell you about it now." He nods, knowing what I mean. I take a deep breath, then begin.

"David was the only one who knew I was gay. We kind of figured out our sexualities together because, well, we had fallen in love." I take another deep breath. I haven't told anyone this yet. Benji is the first to hear.

"No one knew we were dating, though our friends figured it out at some point. Anyway. One day, David and I were in my room and we started kissing. Then my mom walked in on us. It was horrible. She told my dad. He said David and I were not to see or talk to each other ever again. That's when they told me we were moving." I shrug. "That's how we ended up here." I shrug again. Benji rubs my back a little.

"Are your parents homophobic?" he asks gently.

"Not so much as they think being gay is the all-time biggest sin in the entire universe," I explain.

"Oh, Seb," Benji murmurs, kissing my head.

"Now you see why I acted that way towards Billy when I met him?"

"Yeah." Benji holds me tighter. "I wish I could change your parents' minds."

"Me too," I whisper.

We sit for a while in silence, just holding on to each other. I snuggle closer to Benji, practically sitting in his lap. He strokes the back of my neck softly with his fingertips. I let his gentle actions soothe me. Then I sigh and say,

"What would I do without you, Benji?" Benji chuckles lightly.

"You probably would be getting better marks in history," he replies. I make an amused noise.

"Probably.....But in all seriousness, I don't know how I'd be surviving without you. So, just...Thanks for everything."

"No thanks necessary," Benji tells me. "It's just what friends do." He shrugs.

Stay Tuned for Chapter 5!
[benji's confession]
What does Benji confess?
What does Seb think?
All this and more!
Coming soon!

Reviews are lovely! ♥